Ah, my old nemesis and friend, I’ve missed you. Well, no I haven’t, actually, you can get bent. Wait, you can’t? Oh yeah, well, at least beat it. Go pound sand or something.
Welcome to the rodeo! It’s been a year since we started this Infertility to In Vitro Fertization to Baby process. We started right now one year ago. I am going to post/link just some of the highlights from my other blog below, in case you haven’t been with me from the beginning of this crazy ass journey. If you are going through all this or if you know someone going through all this, please read won’t you? You just might learn something about how all this feels and what you can do (and really SHOULDN’T DO AND SAY) to support people going through all this. Get a teeny tiny coffee and read along with me, won’t you?
I started the birth control pills, which I write about here – It’s Not Me, It’s the Hormones.
And then there were the hormones, the motherloving hormones – Kicking Ass on Hormones.
The daily experience that was my life for a while there – also this is what’s pictured above. Bastard. Transvaginal Ultrasounds and Blood Tests for All My Friends!
We found out we were pregnant on MOTHER’S DAY last year. Can you believe that shit? This was the last post I shared before we knew. But it would be many weeks before we made it public, we were scared the whole way through.
Double the Gratitude. It’s twins! Hall & Oates become a thing.
And then there was more Darkness.
There’s NO TIME – they are almost here!
And then, just like that – THEY’RE HERE
You still with me? I appreciate you going through all of this with me. It has been quite a year. You know we wound up with twins, and that is why. We had one shot. Due to medical and financial restraints, even WITH insurance, and we got our two babies. WE HAD ONE SHOT. That will never ever escape us. There are even more posts on my old blog (birth story here) if you look at January through now, you know, as if you hadn’t heard enough.
It doesn’t end like that for everyone and we know how lucky we are and we do cherish every moment. We do. Gladly. But fuckall if it hasn’t been a rollercoaster. Anyone going through all of this, please know you are not crazy. It’s the drugs and the emotions (feelings aren’t facts) that make you feel that way and it will pass. This Infertility and In Vitro shit ain’t for sissies. That part was the hardest. The pregnancy and the having the babies was easy. Well, not really, but you catch my drift. Those of you who are still struggling with your journey after many many many tries, I love you. I love you and support you and you have all my wishes for happiness in whatever form that winds up taking. I wish I could give this gift to you more than anything and believe me, I play the “why me and not them?” game in my head all the damn time. I don’t have an answer. Just keep going in hope and love and thank you for sharing your stories and loving support with me as I’ve gone through all of this. I got your back.
I cannot believe we are here a year later with two beautiful babies that were born of science, hope and love. The devil science gave us these babies and I for one, am so grateful we live in an age where that is possible. Choosing hope the whole way through was a choice. Believing that it could work and that this would all work out some how some way was a choice. We are on to a whole nother set of challenges and loveliness now with the babies, but this past year is one we will never forget. Thank you for going on this journey with us. It meant a lot to be able to share our highs and lows with you and I will continue to do so as long as you’ll allow me to do so. GRATITUDE ABOUNDS.