I am so Angry and Tired and Sad but I Refuse to Stop Rising Up

I swear to god the punches just keep on coming.

If it’s something good and decent and kind, it will be ripped away right now.  It feels like every good move or victory for empathy and compassion and inclusion has been burned to the ground, or will be soon and I am just holding my breath because I swear to gods if they come for our libraries, I AM GOING TO LOSE MY SHIT.

We need good public education.  ALL these kids deserve better.  ALL these educators deserve better.  This DeVos appointment is an outrage.  EVEN PEOPLE WITHOUT KIDS SHOULD BE CONCERNED BECAUSE THIS IS OUR FUTURE WE ARE TALKING ABOUT.  This is about separation of church and state and so much more.

Listen.  I am angry.  I am incredibly disheartened.  I am exhausted.  Like, the bags under my eyes have their own zip code right now.

But I REFUSE TO STOP RISING UP.

This is the WE.

This is mama bear like you’ve never seen before.  I will mama bear you so hard you won’t know what hit you.  

And I’m not talking about just my kids, I’m talking about human beings of every color, size, race, religion, body part, ability, capability, fetish, addiction, poverty level – even you banana eaters – I will fight for YOU and your right to love what and who you love and to not feel persecuted because of it.

You eat those bananas.  You devour them and leave the smell (gag) and the slime (barf) all over my dress, I don’t care.  I am here for you getting to eat those damn bananas if that’s what you want to do.  BUT YOU CANNOT MAKE ME EAT THEM.  Do you understand?

I am here for you doing whatever the hell you need to do with your own body because I know from personal experience that those decisions never come easily and weigh so heavily.

Every punch, every threat to take away these rights makes me rage more and turn that rage into productivity and organization of how to do things better and more effectively because I swear to god, this hatred cannot win.

I don’t know who wrote this, but if you do, please tell me so I can credit them and kiss them on the lips like, HARD.

BATTLE CRY.

So, I cry.  I rage.  I throw things.  But know this.

I REFUSE TO STOP RISING UP.

This is the WE.

I will not stop fighting for what is kind and what is right and just.  I will continue to teach my kids that kindness is the most important thing, even when it’s hard, we try to be kind.  We need to be decent to each other even if we don’t like each other.  But do not mistake our kindness for weakness, no sir.  Mama bears have giant claws.  And we can use them if we feel threatened.

But I digress.

We are now at the point where we have to FIGHT for kindness.

It is not black and white down the line, hatred or love.  Kindness or fear.  It’s muddled and difficult to wade through.  But we are capable of this fight.  We are capable of figuring out how to choose kindness over darkness.  To choose love.  I will keep choosing love and kindness and inclusion rather than exclusion and hate and fear.

I am more emboldened than ever to share kindness and compassion and understanding as more and more seem emboldened to share hatred and pass that on to their kids.  NOT HERE.  NOT IN MY HOUSE.

I still have buckets of hope.  Through my rage-filled tears I see the hope all around me.  As much as the news reports the hate and the fear, I see love and kindness all around us.  I look at our kids and I see it in the sweetest little ways every day.  I have hope to spare, I will continue to share it with you.

Listen, I once was lost, but now am found.  I fought too hard to find my voice and my place and my people (that includes you) and I am not letting anybody take that away from me.

It’s not just politics.  It’s EVERYTHING.  This is not normal.  We need to keep rising up and resisting.  And white people, I say this with all the humility I have – we need to rise up next to our brothers and sisters of color and stand arm in arm.  We need to listen to them.  They’ve been fighting these fights their whole lives and we are just catching up.

You know where I stand.  Where do you stand?

See also (forever):

What does a whore look like?

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