Raising twins and staying sober 24 hours at a time.
BUT I DIDN'T. Don't call the authorities on me. I am a lover, not a fighter. I mean thank gods for that impulse control we can harness, amiright? OH THIS GIRL. Here's the scene. The girl (3 or maybe 4 years old) is at the train table, you know train tracks and about 20 different …
Continue reading "I Almost Punched a Little Girl at the Library"
To the woman at the park heartbroken with infertility, Thank you. Thank you for approaching us right away and saying hello. Thank you for asking if they are twins. YES. Yes they are and they are, "HEY HOW OLD ARE YOU TWO?" "TWO. WE GONNA BE FREE ON OUR BIRFDAY." Thank you for NOT immediately …
Continue reading "To the Woman at the Park Heartbroken with Infertility"
As a parent you have good days and you have bad days. Some days I parent my kids better than other days. Some days I have more patience. Some days they watch too much Daniel Tiger and Dora and only eat peanut butter and jam sandwiches all day. Some days my kids are absolute stinkers. …
Continue reading "The Days Parents Remember and the Days Kids Will Forget"
Too Sober For This 