“What can I get for my 2 year old for Christmas?” Really? REALLY? 2-year-olds, at least mine, have no concept of what they want other than what is right in front of them. They want what their siblings have or what we say they cannot have. In that spirit, and going off what I wrote last year about What 1-Year-Old Twins want from Santa, I give you the list this year for what 2-year-olds want from Santa, from their perspective:
- Chapstick. Preferably the generic kind that makes even more of a mess. We love finding it, carrying it around, and of course opening and closing it 8000 times in between smearing it all over our adorable faces.
- Whatever is IN THAT LOCKED CABINET OF WONDERS. Spoiler alert – it’s cleaning supplies.
- To go upstairs when the gate is up BY MYSELF so that I can sit in the rocking chair and laugh when Mama comes in to find me. She laughs every single time even when I do it 5 times in a row.
- Free access to the room with all the water and all the wonders inside. WHY DO THEY LOCK US OUT WITH THEIR FEET WHILE THEY ARE IN THERE? We just want to be with them always.
- Just tell me WHERE DADA? already. I’ll keep asking 736 times a day, but you could throw me a bone too, Santa.
- Pushing that glowy button to the work machine 85 times before they come in and find me and we all laugh. Mommy looks a little bothered though. I am just helping her work!
- THE CAT. THE CAT LITTER. THE CAT WATER. THE CAT FOOD. THE CAT. BRING ME THE MOW.
- The Christmas tree.
- Dada bee-boop. (translation – Daddy play cars with me)
- That orange. NO THIS ORANGE.
- Mommy’s bracelet.
- Mommy’s hair.
- Mommy’s lipstick off her face RIGHT NOW.
- Mommy’s shirt.
- Mommy’s dignity.
- Whatever she’s having even though I had the same thing and threw it on the floor 5 seconds ago I WANT WHAT SHE HAS.
- Ovejita. I just want lamby. Peas. PEAS.
- Whatever’s in the garbage and recycling. WHY WOULD YOU THROW THESE TREASURES AWAY?
- That smashed wee-wee* on the floor that could be from today or 3 weeks ago but it has plenty of fuzz on it so it’s all good.
- The blue marker. NO I SAID THE BLUE MARKER.
Here’s the thing. 2-year-olds don’t know what they want from Santa. We aren’t getting them anything. They will get gifts from relatives and I’m sure it will be too much. We are loved.
A girlfriend said it perfectly, “You know what 2-year-olds want for Christmas? Whatever we tell them they want.”
What is evident and clear is that they want you. They want to spend time with you and be with you as much as possible. And I for one, will take them up on it while I can and spend all my holiday time with them. I will let them climb me and strip me of my clothing and jewelry and dignity, and I will be ever so happy to do so. They want kisses and hugs and snuggles and then they want you to go away, but in a minute they want you right back. They want you to sing the alphabet song with you and point out which letter is “e” and “m”. They want to rest on your feet as you “make them fly”. They want a dance party. They want you to chase them around the circle in the house and squeal with joy when they get caught. They want comfort and laughter and excitement and a soft place to land. These are all gifts I can afford and afford in excess. Material things can wait. They are my babies and they can have whatever they want as long as what they want is me.
*wee-wees = raisins.
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Too Sober For This 