Raising twins and staying sober 24 hours at a time.
BUT I DIDN'T. Don't call the authorities on me. I am a lover, not a fighter. I mean thank gods for that impulse control we can harness, amiright? OH THIS GIRL. Here's the scene. The girl (3 or maybe 4 years old) is at the train table, you know train tracks and about 20 different …
Continue reading "I Almost Punched a Little Girl at the Library"
Hey kids. I know it's hard to believe, but I was alive a long time before I became your mom. Before I ever knew your names or what you would look like, before I knew your smell or your mischievous laughter, there was a woman who lived about three lifetimes to be ready. I don't …
I can't get you out of my head. Rather, I can't get your boy out of my head. After I heard you say it for the third time, "WHAT ARE YOU CHICKEN?" as your boy was at the top of the slide taking in his options, my blood was boiling. It crushed my heart to …
Continue reading "Dear Dad at the Park Calling Your Son Chicken for Not Wanting to Slide"
Too Sober For This 